My boyfriend of eight months recently dumped me very unexpectedly. I am having a very painful time dealing with this as I do not hate him. I am still in love with him. I have never been in love with a man like this one. I wasn’t even in love with my ex-husband. At the age of 49 I never thought love could hurt so much. I need closure and I would love more than anything to work things out and get back with him. It seems my life is spiraling backwards and I pray my ex-boyfriend and I can work things out. He has some family issues but will not open up to me. It’s painful and sad.
Yes, love hurts when one person is in love and the feeling isn’t mutual. Are you in love with him or are you in love with having a boyfriend? Sometimes it’s hard to tell. Many people stay with someone simply because they are afraid to be alone. Do some soul searching to see if it is him you want to be with or you are simply in love with having a boyfriend. If you are positive you want to be with him, then send him an E-Mail expressing how you feel. Let him know that you are still there for him if he wants to talk.
You can’t force him to open up to you. The ball is then in his court. While waiting for his response you need to talk and talk and talk until you get all your feelings out. Do you have a girlfriend or sister who is a good listener that you can pour your heart out to? This will help you get through a painful time. If you don’t have anyone to talk to then I would suggest journaling to get your feelings out. Write down in a book how hurt you are and why you loved him so much. Make two lists, one for pros and one for cons of being with him.
When you see things in black & white then you will be able to determine if you are truly in love with him. In the meantime, be patient with yourself and him and keep your eyes open for someone who will appreciate you and all your good qualities.